Frank Zappa
- Začetnik teme GKZ
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- 06.07.2010
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"The Idiot Bastard Son"
"The Idiot Bastard Son"
[includes a line from the Run Home, Slow soundtrack]
[The idiot bastard son:]
(THE FATHER'S A NAZI IN CONGRESS TODAY . . .
THE MOTHER'S A HOOKER SOMEWHERE IN L.A.)
[The idiot bastard son:]
(ABANDONED TO PERISH IN BACK OF A CAR . . .
KENNY WILL STASH HIM AWAY IN A JAR)
THE IDIOT BOY!
[Motorhead:]
I never wanted to because I was too small to start with, I used to drink really some bad stuff . . . Wine, all kinds of wine! Mixed, seven different varieties . . . Thunderbird wine . . . I don't know but I chugged a fifth of White Port once and passed out one day (heh heh) . . . and I drank a quart of beer just before that . . . and we were out riding around in the desert . . .
. . . very strange! Anyway . . .
Try and imagine
The window all covered in green
All the time he would spend
At the church he'd attend . . .
Warming his pew
Kenny will feed him & Ronnie will watch
THE CHILD WILL THRIVE & GROW
And enter the world
Of liars & cheaters & people like you
Who smile & think you know
What this is about
(YOU THINK YOU KNOW EVERYTHING . . . maybe so)
The song we sing: DO YOU KNOW?
We're listening . . .
THE IDIOT BOY!
Try and imagine
The window all covered in green
All the time he would spend
All the colors he'd blend . . .
Where are they now?
[Gary Kellgren:]
Right now I have two hit records on the charts, but it has not made me any money. It has only brought me fame and glory, and a lot of work. Which I do, really not care to tell . . .
"The Idiot Bastard Son"
[includes a line from the Run Home, Slow soundtrack]
[The idiot bastard son:]
(THE FATHER'S A NAZI IN CONGRESS TODAY . . .
THE MOTHER'S A HOOKER SOMEWHERE IN L.A.)
[The idiot bastard son:]
(ABANDONED TO PERISH IN BACK OF A CAR . . .
KENNY WILL STASH HIM AWAY IN A JAR)
THE IDIOT BOY!
[Motorhead:]
I never wanted to because I was too small to start with, I used to drink really some bad stuff . . . Wine, all kinds of wine! Mixed, seven different varieties . . . Thunderbird wine . . . I don't know but I chugged a fifth of White Port once and passed out one day (heh heh) . . . and I drank a quart of beer just before that . . . and we were out riding around in the desert . . .
. . . very strange! Anyway . . .
Try and imagine
The window all covered in green
All the time he would spend
At the church he'd attend . . .
Warming his pew
Kenny will feed him & Ronnie will watch
THE CHILD WILL THRIVE & GROW
And enter the world
Of liars & cheaters & people like you
Who smile & think you know
What this is about
(YOU THINK YOU KNOW EVERYTHING . . . maybe so)
The song we sing: DO YOU KNOW?
We're listening . . .
THE IDIOT BOY!
Try and imagine
The window all covered in green
All the time he would spend
All the colors he'd blend . . .
Where are they now?
[Gary Kellgren:]
Right now I have two hit records on the charts, but it has not made me any money. It has only brought me fame and glory, and a lot of work. Which I do, really not care to tell . . .
MODERATOR
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- 06.07.2010
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"The Illinois Enema Bandit"
"The Illinois Enema Bandit"
The Illinois Enema Bandit
I heard he's on the loose
I heard he's on the loose
Lord, the pitiful screams
Of all them college-educated women . . .
Boy, he'd just be tyin' 'em up
(They'd be all bound down!)
Just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bag fulla
The Illinois Enema Bandit Juice
He just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bag fulla
The Illinois Enema Bandit Juice
[repeat]
The Illinois Enema Bandit ! heard it on the news !
I heard it on the news
Bloomington Illinois ... he has caused some alarm
Just sneakin' around there
From farm to farm
Got a rubberized bag
And a hose on his arm
Lookin' for some rustic co-ed rump
That he just might wanna pump
[repeat]
The Illinois Enema Bandit
Some day he'll have to pay
Some day he'll have to pay
The police will say, "You're under arrest!"
And the judge would have him for a special guest
The D.A. will order a secret test
And stuff his pudgy little thumbs in the side of his vest
Then they'll put out a call for the jury folks
And the judge would say, "No poo-poo jokesl"
Then they'll drag in the bandit for all to see,
Saying "Don't nobody have no sympathy . . .
HOT SOAPY WATER in the FIRST DEGREE!"
And the Bandit might say, "Why is everbody always pickin' on me?"
WELL DID YOU CAUSE THIS MISERY?
WELL DID YOU CAUSE THIS MISERY?
WELL DID YOU CAUSE THIS MISERY?
One girl shout: "Let the Bandit be!"
BANDIT ARE YOU GUILTY?
TELL ME, WHAT'S YOUR PLEA?
Another girl shout; "Let fhe friend go free!"
ARE YOU GUILTY?
BANDIT, DID YOU DO THESE DEEDS?
"he Bandit say, "It must be just what they all needs . . "
[etc. repeat]
"The Illinois Enema Bandit"
The Illinois Enema Bandit
I heard he's on the loose
I heard he's on the loose
Lord, the pitiful screams
Of all them college-educated women . . .
Boy, he'd just be tyin' 'em up
(They'd be all bound down!)
Just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bag fulla
The Illinois Enema Bandit Juice
He just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bag fulla
The Illinois Enema Bandit Juice
[repeat]
The Illinois Enema Bandit ! heard it on the news !
I heard it on the news
Bloomington Illinois ... he has caused some alarm
Just sneakin' around there
From farm to farm
Got a rubberized bag
And a hose on his arm
Lookin' for some rustic co-ed rump
That he just might wanna pump
[repeat]
The Illinois Enema Bandit
Some day he'll have to pay
Some day he'll have to pay
The police will say, "You're under arrest!"
And the judge would have him for a special guest
The D.A. will order a secret test
And stuff his pudgy little thumbs in the side of his vest
Then they'll put out a call for the jury folks
And the judge would say, "No poo-poo jokesl"
Then they'll drag in the bandit for all to see,
Saying "Don't nobody have no sympathy . . .
HOT SOAPY WATER in the FIRST DEGREE!"
And the Bandit might say, "Why is everbody always pickin' on me?"
WELL DID YOU CAUSE THIS MISERY?
WELL DID YOU CAUSE THIS MISERY?
WELL DID YOU CAUSE THIS MISERY?
One girl shout: "Let the Bandit be!"
BANDIT ARE YOU GUILTY?
TELL ME, WHAT'S YOUR PLEA?
Another girl shout; "Let fhe friend go free!"
ARE YOU GUILTY?
BANDIT, DID YOU DO THESE DEEDS?
"he Bandit say, "It must be just what they all needs . . "
[etc. repeat]
MODERATOR
- Učlanjen(a)
- 06.07.2010
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"The Jazz Discharge Party Hats"
"The Jazz Discharge Party Hats"
Once upon a time
It was in Albuquerque, New Mexico
There were these girls that worked at the college
They were really cool . . .
(They thought so anyway)
They would be delighted to tell you
how suave they were At the drop of a hat
There was three of 'em:
One of them thought she was a
Beauty Queen . . .
The other one was a Walking Blow-Job
And then there was this skinny girl . . .
Oh well . . .
Some of the guys in the band got together
With the girls from the college
They were having a good time . . .
(We were in Albuquerque for a couple of days)
But these girls thought they were Hot Shit
'N wouldn't pooch the guys in the band
On the first day, so ...
A couple of the guys in the band
Who were desperate for THAT KIND OF ACTION
Kept workin' on 'em for two days
(Which is a waste of fuckin' time anyway . . . )
So, anyway . . .
But if that's your idea of a good time, what the hey?
Send those pants up here!
Here's some more!
Okay, good-good!
Traditional cotton ... oh, how sweet!
Umf. . . huh-huh-huh-huhhh . . .
HERE! Work these!
Anyway . . .
We're in Albuquerque, New Mexico . . .
A couple of the guys in the band, who shall go nameless
Because their girlfriends might find out
Decided they were gonna work the wall on these girls
From the college
So, one night ... it was the first night
When they were still trying to 'get it in there'
(Ya know what I mean? Huh-huh-huh . . .)
The skinny girl, she says to one of the guys in the band
She says, well, to several of the guys in the band
And one of the T-shirt guys too . . .
"HEY! LET'S GO SKINNY-DIPPING!"
At two o'clock in the morning at the pool at the hotel
That's right, you heard right,
Two o'clock in the morning, pool at the hotel . . .
It was so fun . . .
But the water was very, very cold!
So they go out there and the girl who was really skinny
'N' probably totally insensitive to climatic changes
Took all of her garments off and she jumped in the pool
And she says, "HEY GUYS! COME ON IN!"
Well, one of them did ...
The other one was too smart for that shit
So him and the T-shirt guy sat by the edge of the pool
And when the girl who was really skinny
(And insensitive to climatic changes)
Took off her clothes and jumped in the pool
She threw her pants over there by the little table
Well, one of the guys from the band picked up her panties
(He told me later the stuff in the bottom
Was like punching an eclair . . .)
Anyhow . . . there was nothing else to do ...
It was Albuquerque, New Mexico
It's two o'clock in the morning . . .
They're not going to get any nooky anyway . . .
So this one guy and the T-shirt guy
Started sniffing the girl's panties . . .
They were sniffing the fudge and sniffing the glue . . .
Sniffing every 'thing' that adhered to these
Delightful little morsels
(Some of you might think this is weird. . .
No wonder.
It's not exactly normal, but
What the fuck?)
So, they're snorting it ...
(Hey! It's the twentieth century . . .
Whatever you can do to have a good time, let's get on with it,
So long as it doesn't cause a murder . . .)
So they're snorting the pants
'N' then they put them on their heads . . .
They were having a good time . . .
The girl was in the water . . . she didn't even see
What was going on with her underpants . . .
They were wearing the pants
It looked just like a tiny little party hat . . .
Their ears were sticking out the side ...
it was so fun
Later on they discovered,
This would make a great way of life for them...
They would go from town to town looking for panties
They would take the panties after they were hung up
On the clothes line
Later on they would take 'em back in the dressing room
They would play with them...
They would fetish the underpants...
They would snort every little morsel attached
To The underpants... and then... they would feel that
They were FULFILLED
And so you can see
That what we're doing here on stage
Is part of a Great American Tradition
The tradition of the
JAZZ DISCHARGE PARTY HATS
"The Jazz Discharge Party Hats"
Once upon a time
It was in Albuquerque, New Mexico
There were these girls that worked at the college
They were really cool . . .
(They thought so anyway)
They would be delighted to tell you
how suave they were At the drop of a hat
There was three of 'em:
One of them thought she was a
Beauty Queen . . .
The other one was a Walking Blow-Job
And then there was this skinny girl . . .
Oh well . . .
Some of the guys in the band got together
With the girls from the college
They were having a good time . . .
(We were in Albuquerque for a couple of days)
But these girls thought they were Hot Shit
'N wouldn't pooch the guys in the band
On the first day, so ...
A couple of the guys in the band
Who were desperate for THAT KIND OF ACTION
Kept workin' on 'em for two days
(Which is a waste of fuckin' time anyway . . . )
So, anyway . . .
But if that's your idea of a good time, what the hey?
Send those pants up here!
Here's some more!
Okay, good-good!
Traditional cotton ... oh, how sweet!
Umf. . . huh-huh-huh-huhhh . . .
HERE! Work these!
Anyway . . .
We're in Albuquerque, New Mexico . . .
A couple of the guys in the band, who shall go nameless
Because their girlfriends might find out
Decided they were gonna work the wall on these girls
From the college
So, one night ... it was the first night
When they were still trying to 'get it in there'
(Ya know what I mean? Huh-huh-huh . . .)
The skinny girl, she says to one of the guys in the band
She says, well, to several of the guys in the band
And one of the T-shirt guys too . . .
"HEY! LET'S GO SKINNY-DIPPING!"
At two o'clock in the morning at the pool at the hotel
That's right, you heard right,
Two o'clock in the morning, pool at the hotel . . .
It was so fun . . .
But the water was very, very cold!
So they go out there and the girl who was really skinny
'N' probably totally insensitive to climatic changes
Took all of her garments off and she jumped in the pool
And she says, "HEY GUYS! COME ON IN!"
Well, one of them did ...
The other one was too smart for that shit
So him and the T-shirt guy sat by the edge of the pool
And when the girl who was really skinny
(And insensitive to climatic changes)
Took off her clothes and jumped in the pool
She threw her pants over there by the little table
Well, one of the guys from the band picked up her panties
(He told me later the stuff in the bottom
Was like punching an eclair . . .)
Anyhow . . . there was nothing else to do ...
It was Albuquerque, New Mexico
It's two o'clock in the morning . . .
They're not going to get any nooky anyway . . .
So this one guy and the T-shirt guy
Started sniffing the girl's panties . . .
They were sniffing the fudge and sniffing the glue . . .
Sniffing every 'thing' that adhered to these
Delightful little morsels
(Some of you might think this is weird. . .
No wonder.
It's not exactly normal, but
What the fuck?)
So, they're snorting it ...
(Hey! It's the twentieth century . . .
Whatever you can do to have a good time, let's get on with it,
So long as it doesn't cause a murder . . .)
So they're snorting the pants
'N' then they put them on their heads . . .
They were having a good time . . .
The girl was in the water . . . she didn't even see
What was going on with her underpants . . .
They were wearing the pants
It looked just like a tiny little party hat . . .
Their ears were sticking out the side ...
it was so fun
Later on they discovered,
This would make a great way of life for them...
They would go from town to town looking for panties
They would take the panties after they were hung up
On the clothes line
Later on they would take 'em back in the dressing room
They would play with them...
They would fetish the underpants...
They would snort every little morsel attached
To The underpants... and then... they would feel that
They were FULFILLED
And so you can see
That what we're doing here on stage
Is part of a Great American Tradition
The tradition of the
JAZZ DISCHARGE PARTY HATS
MODERATOR
- Učlanjen(a)
- 06.07.2010
- Poruka
- 30.267
"The Jimmy Carl Black Philosophy Lesson"
"The Jimmy Carl Black Philosophy Lesson"
[FZ:] At this very moment Jimmy Carl Black the Indian of the group is approaching the stage. Jimmy Carl, who likes to drink and also likes to boogie all night long and who is also horny, approaches Underwood in his transformed state at the piano and asks him this all important question:
[JCB:] Hey I thought we were gonna play a Rock & Roll concert. What is this?
[Ian:] Jimmy Carl Black, Indian of the group: four-fours.
[JCB:] How are you gonna get laid if you dont play rock & roll and drink beer? You get laid after the concert if you play rock & roll, this kind of crap you're not gonna, you're not gonna get laid anyway with that uniform on. I'll tell you what I'm gonna do. I'm gonna quit I'm gonna go out and hustle me some chick, the hell with you.
[Ian:] Jimmy, you need some discipline.
[JCB:] I'm leaving the group.
[Ensemble:] Boo! Boo!
[FZ:] Jimmy Carl, I must inform you, I must inform you, Jimmy Carl, for your own good, that here in London you're not gonna get any pussy unless you look like a popstar. Fix him up! . . . Mod Jacket . . .
([JCB:] Oh Jeezus . . . )
[FZ:] Frilly Mod Neckpiece, Jimi Hendrix wig, and a Feather Boa.
[JCB:] WAAAAAAAAAAHHH!
[FZ:] Jimmy Carl Black enters the audience to hustle some young ladies. Go on Jim, see if you can get any action, and if you get lucky fix us up too. And if you're really lucky, get something for the robots . . . Mmmm, their little mechanical things are going up and down, up and down . . .
"The Jimmy Carl Black Philosophy Lesson"
[FZ:] At this very moment Jimmy Carl Black the Indian of the group is approaching the stage. Jimmy Carl, who likes to drink and also likes to boogie all night long and who is also horny, approaches Underwood in his transformed state at the piano and asks him this all important question:
[JCB:] Hey I thought we were gonna play a Rock & Roll concert. What is this?
[Ian:] Jimmy Carl Black, Indian of the group: four-fours.
[JCB:] How are you gonna get laid if you dont play rock & roll and drink beer? You get laid after the concert if you play rock & roll, this kind of crap you're not gonna, you're not gonna get laid anyway with that uniform on. I'll tell you what I'm gonna do. I'm gonna quit I'm gonna go out and hustle me some chick, the hell with you.
[Ian:] Jimmy, you need some discipline.
[JCB:] I'm leaving the group.
[Ensemble:] Boo! Boo!
[FZ:] Jimmy Carl, I must inform you, I must inform you, Jimmy Carl, for your own good, that here in London you're not gonna get any pussy unless you look like a popstar. Fix him up! . . . Mod Jacket . . .
([JCB:] Oh Jeezus . . . )
[FZ:] Frilly Mod Neckpiece, Jimi Hendrix wig, and a Feather Boa.
[JCB:] WAAAAAAAAAAHHH!
[FZ:] Jimmy Carl Black enters the audience to hustle some young ladies. Go on Jim, see if you can get any action, and if you get lucky fix us up too. And if you're really lucky, get something for the robots . . . Mmmm, their little mechanical things are going up and down, up and down . . .
MODERATOR
- Učlanjen(a)
- 06.07.2010
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"The Legend Of The Golden Arches"
"The Legend Of The Golden Arches"
[includes Uncle Meat]
Heh heh heh . . . GrrrRRRNNHH . . .
[Suzy:]
The first thing that attracted me to Mothers music was the fact that they played for twenty minutes and everybody was hissing and booing and falling off the dance floor . . . And Elmer was yelling at them to get off stage and turn down their amplifiers
"The Legend Of The Golden Arches"
[includes Uncle Meat]
Heh heh heh . . . GrrrRRRNNHH . . .
[Suzy:]
The first thing that attracted me to Mothers music was the fact that they played for twenty minutes and everybody was hissing and booing and falling off the dance floor . . . And Elmer was yelling at them to get off stage and turn down their amplifiers
MODERATOR
- Učlanjen(a)
- 06.07.2010
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"The Little House I Used To Live In"
"The Little House I Used To Live In"
[FZ:] Thank you, good night . . . Thank you, if you'll . . . if you sit down and be quiet, we'll make an attempt to, ah, perform Brown Shoes Don't Make It.
[Man In Uniform:] Back on your seats, come on, we'll help you back to your seats, come on . . .
[Guy In The Audience:] Take that man out of here! Oh! Go away! Take that uniform off man! Take that bloody uniform before it's fuckin' too late, man!
[FZ:] Everybody in this room is wearing a uniform, and don't kid yourself.
[Guy In The Audience:] . . . man!
[FZ:] You'll hurt your throat, stop it!
"The Little House I Used To Live In"
[FZ:] Thank you, good night . . . Thank you, if you'll . . . if you sit down and be quiet, we'll make an attempt to, ah, perform Brown Shoes Don't Make It.
[Man In Uniform:] Back on your seats, come on, we'll help you back to your seats, come on . . .
[Guy In The Audience:] Take that man out of here! Oh! Go away! Take that uniform off man! Take that bloody uniform before it's fuckin' too late, man!
[FZ:] Everybody in this room is wearing a uniform, and don't kid yourself.
[Guy In The Audience:] . . . man!
[FZ:] You'll hurt your throat, stop it!
MODERATOR
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- 06.07.2010
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"The Living Garbage Truck"
"The Living Garbage Truck"
[includes quotes from Mona Bone Jakon (Cat Stevens) and Long Hot Summer Night (Jimi Hendrix)]
[Bruce:] Bruce [?] . . .
[FZ:] What?
[Bruce:] From Reprise Records
[FZ:] Hi, there, how you doing?
[Bruce:] How you doing? Nice to see you again
[FZ:] Alright
[Bruce:] How's it going?
[FZ:] Well, it's alright
[Bruce:] Good. Hey, we got a neat publicity stunt we'd like to try
[FZ:] What's the stunt?
[Bruce:] We got a garbage truck we'd like to get some pictures of you and the Mothers on it
[FZ:] That's probably one of the most terrible ideas I've ever heard in my life! We're going down there?
[Bruce:] Yeah!
[Mark:] You'd love it, you know that?
[Bruce:] And, uh, we got that news paper here to cover it and, uh, plus, the front of the chart and stuff
[FZ:] The front of the chart . . .
[Bruce:] Yes, the, uh, FM chart that's put over here in Vancouver as a distribution for fifty thousand
[FZ:] What do you think, Dick?
[Dick:] What? A photo at the garbage truck?
[Bruce:] I think it's really gonna be a great idea, I really do
. . . on the other side of that
"But it won't be lonely for long . . . "
What's the deal?
[Howard:] Must we stand amidst the scum to get the idea across?
"Where are you on this ah long hot summer
Where are you on this ah . . . "
[Mark:] Are we going in it?
You think you can possibly . . . with the foot there?
"The Living Garbage Truck"
[includes quotes from Mona Bone Jakon (Cat Stevens) and Long Hot Summer Night (Jimi Hendrix)]
[Bruce:] Bruce [?] . . .
[FZ:] What?
[Bruce:] From Reprise Records
[FZ:] Hi, there, how you doing?
[Bruce:] How you doing? Nice to see you again
[FZ:] Alright
[Bruce:] How's it going?
[FZ:] Well, it's alright
[Bruce:] Good. Hey, we got a neat publicity stunt we'd like to try
[FZ:] What's the stunt?
[Bruce:] We got a garbage truck we'd like to get some pictures of you and the Mothers on it
[FZ:] That's probably one of the most terrible ideas I've ever heard in my life! We're going down there?
[Bruce:] Yeah!
[Mark:] You'd love it, you know that?
[Bruce:] And, uh, we got that news paper here to cover it and, uh, plus, the front of the chart and stuff
[FZ:] The front of the chart . . .
[Bruce:] Yes, the, uh, FM chart that's put over here in Vancouver as a distribution for fifty thousand
[FZ:] What do you think, Dick?
[Dick:] What? A photo at the garbage truck?
[Bruce:] I think it's really gonna be a great idea, I really do
. . . on the other side of that
"But it won't be lonely for long . . . "
What's the deal?
[Howard:] Must we stand amidst the scum to get the idea across?
"Where are you on this ah long hot summer
Where are you on this ah . . . "
[Mark:] Are we going in it?
You think you can possibly . . . with the foot there?