Frank Zappa

[fox69]

"Jewish Princess"

"Jewish Princess"



I want a nasty little Jewish Princess
With long phony nails and a hairdo that rinses
A horny little Jewish Princess
With a garlic aroma that could level Tacoma
Lonely inside
Well, she can swallow my pride

I want a hairy little Jewish Princess
With a brand new nose, who knows where it goes
I want a steamy little Jewish Princess
With over-worked gums, who squeaks when she cums
I don't want no troll
I just want a Yemenite hole

I want a darling little Jewish Princess
Who don't know shit about cooking and is arrogant looking
A vicious little Jewish Princess
To specifically happen with a pee-pee that's snapping
All up inside
I just want a princess to ride
Alright, back to the top... everybody twist!

I want a funky little Jewish Princess
A grinder; a bumper, with a pre-moistened dumper
A brazen little Jewish Princess
With titanic tits, and sand blasted zits
She can even be poor
So long as she does it with four on the floor
(Vapor-lock)

I want a dainty little Jewish Princess
With a couple of sisters who can raise a few blisters
A fragile little Jewish Princess
With Romanian thighs, who weasels 'n' lies
For two or three nights
Won't someone send me a princess who bites
Won't someone send me a princess who bites
Won't someone send me a princess who bites
Won't someone send me a princess who bites

 

[fox69]

"Jezebel Boy"

"Jezebel Boy"


[includes quotes from Perry Mason Theme (Steiner) and Jingle Bells (Pierpont)]

Jezebel Boy!
You know all the guys
In the Sheriff's Patrol
They leave you alone
When they round up the whores
Up on Hollywood Boulebard

(What?
Now this is what happens in Los Angeles . . . )

Sometimes that ol' nasty D.A., you say
Thinks he needs his name
In the paper again -
That's when
The short-pants girls
They have to take that ride
With a friendly, friendly policeman

But the Jezebel Boy
On the corner by the Technicolor processing plant
He stands by the light;
Waitin' through that night
Waitin', waitin' for that, that distinguished-looking
Wilshire District Gentleman
With snow-white hair,
("Maybe I could make a good rock star")
To drive up in his Lincoln,
And whisk away the Jezebel Boy

There he goes now!
Old Ralph will make him put that wretched
Sausage in his mouth again

[Ike:] Hah hah hah! Hah hah hah!
[FZ:] Go ahead!
[Ike:] Hah hah hah!
[FZ:] Want that again?
[Ike:] Yeah, sure!

Old Ralph will make him put that wretched
Sausage in his mouth again
And again
(Again again)
Aaaaand . . . one mo' gin

Well, hah! Well, you know they say . . .
Another day,
Another sausage -
Jezebel Boy

 

[fox69]

"Joe's Garage"

"Joe's Garage"


[Act I]

[SCENE TWO]
[JOE'S GARAGE]

A boring old garage in a residential area with a teenage
band rehearsing in it. JOE (the main character in the CENTRAL
SCRUTINIZER'S Special Presentation) sings to us of the trials
and tribulations of garage- band husbandry.

[JOE:]
It wasn't very large
There was just enough room to cram the drums
In the corner over by the Dodge
It was a fifty-four
With a mashed up door
And

 

[fox69]

"Jones Crusher"

"Jones Crusher"


My baby's got
Jones crushin' love
Jones crushin' love
Jones crushin' love
Well my baby's got
Jones crushin' love
Jones crushin' love
Jones crushin' love

She don't merely fit like a glove
That little girl's got the jones
That little girl's got the Jones
That little girl's got the jones

She's tryin' to
Grind up my Jones
Grind up my Jones
Grind up my Jones
Well, she's tryin'to
Grind up my Jones
Grind up my Jones
Grind up my Jones

She don't ever wanna leave it alone
She can push; she can shove
Till it's just a nub
Just a nub
Just a nub
Here she comes
With her red dress on
Steam shoots out
From the sprinklers on the lawn
The eyes be rollin'
On the concrete fawn
The wind can't blow
'Cause the sky is gone
The wind can't blow
'Cause the sky is gone
The wind can't blow
'Cause the sky is gone

Jones crusher,
Jones crusher
Deadly jaws, better get the gauze
She's a Jones crusher,
Jones crusher
Deadly jaws, better get the gauze
[etc. ad lib]

 

[fox69]

"Jumbo, Go Away"

"Jumbo, Go Away"



Jumbo, go away
Jumbo, go away
Jumbo leave me alone
Get your head off my bone
I wanna go home
("I'm hungry... '')

Jumbo lighten up
Jumbo lighten up
Jumbo give me a break
Lighten up on my snake
That's all I can take
(Robbie take me to Creek Town!)

It seems I can't explain
The way I feel about you
You just don't understand
You're from Kalamazoo.. .
You got to realize
Our little romance deal
Will not materialize
Into a thing that you'd call REAL..
(I think I have worms. . .)

Jumbo gotta go
Jumbo better get back
Or your eye will get black
When I give you a smack (Boo-hoo-hoo. . .)

Jumbo don't you cry
Jumbo don't you cry
Jumbo this is good-bye
I ain't gonna lie
So wash up your pie
Wash up your pie
(There are three things that smell like fish!)
Wash up your pie
(One of them is fish...)
Wash up your pie
(The other two. . .)
Wash up your pie
(Are growing on you. . .)

 

[fox69]

"Just One More Time"

"Just One More Time"


[Don Vliet:]
Oh yeah!
That's just fine!
Come on boys!
Just one more time!

[Spider:] I think I can explain about . . . about how the pigs' music works
[Monica:] Well, this should be interesting
[Spider:] Remember that they make music with a very dense light, and remember about the smoke standing still and how they . . . they really get uptight when you try to move the smoke, right?
[Monica:] Right
[John:] Yeah?
[Spider:] I think the music in that dense light is probably what makes the smoke stand still. Any sort of motion has this effect on . . . on the ponies' manes. You know, the thing on their neck
[John:] Hmm . . .
[Spider:] As soon as the pony's mane starts to get good in the back any sort of mo . . . motion, especially of smoke or gas, begins to make the ends split.
[John:] That's the basis of all their nationalism. Like if they can't salute the smoke every morning when they get up . . .
[Spider:] Yeah, it's a vicious circle. You got it.

 

[fox69]

"Kaiser Rolls"

"Kaiser Rolls"



This is a story, tell it quick as I can
A week ago, I met a stumbler man
He stumbled up, he said, "All I wanna know,
How far the hratche-plche Kaiser Rolls"

I begged his pardon, should have turned and ran,
So hard talking to a stumbler man
He stumbled over, and over again
"The Kaiser hratche Rolls since time began"

I raised my finger from the center of my hand,
Tried to wave farewell to the stumbler man
He slobbered 'n puked (PUGH!) in a garbage can
"The Kaiser hratche Rollin' might raise some sand"

Pushed him aside as he was slowin' my plan
So hard to understand a real stumbler man
Some stuff from his nose, crawled over his clothes, he said,
"Nobody ever tells me which way he goes"

Kaiser rolls 'n rolls 'n rolls
Kaiser rolls, and Kaiser rolls
Surprise to me they ain't catched him yet,
HOW'S ABOUT A DOLLAR FOR SOME CIGARETTE?

 

[fox69]

"Kaiser Rolls (Du Jour)"

"Kaiser Rolls (Du Jour)"


[January 6, 1976
Rehearsal]

This is a story, tell it quick as I can
A week ago, I met a stumbler man
He stumbled up, he said, "All I wanna know,
How far the hratche-plche Kaiser Rolls"

I begged his pardon, should have turned and ran,
So hard talking to a stumbler man
He stumbled over, and over again
"The Kaiser hratche Rolls since time began"

Raised my finger from the center of my hand,
Tried to wave farewell to the stumbler man
He slobbered 'n puked in a garbage can
"The Kaiser hratche Rollin' might raise some sand"

Pushed him aside as he was slowin' my plan
So hard to understand a real stumbler man
Some stuff from his nose, crawled over his clothes, he said,
"Nobody ever tells me which way he goes"

Kaiser rolls 'n rolls 'n rolls
Kaiser rolls, and Kaiser rolls
Surprise to me they ain't catched him yet,
HOW'S ABOUT A DOLLAR FOR SOME CIGARETTE?

 

[fox69]

"Kangaroos"

"Kangaroos"


[Spider:] Oh no, man . . .
[Monica:] Oh . . .
[Spider & Monica:] Kangaroos!
[Monica:] And then they eat it when they get home
[John:] If it's still alive

[Spider:] Envelops the bath tub

 

[fox69]

"Keep It Greasey"

"Keep It Greasey"


[Act II]

[SCENE THIRTEEN]
[KEEP IT GREASEY]

[JOE:]
[annointing himself as he sings]
Keep it greasey so it'll go down easy
Keep it greasey so it'll go down easy
Keep it greasey so it'll go down easy

[MANX:]
Roll it over n grease it down
I'll drive you through the heart of town

JOE (who is still wearing his housewife costume from when
he first picked up SY BORG in The Closet) adjusts his little
apron to a more advantageous posi-tion and sings..

[JOE:]
Hey, the good women, they sure has it tough
The good men, well there ain't enough
All the good girls are lookin' all the time
Good men is something that they can't find
Cause if they find one miraculously
They try to be as lovin as they can be
'Cause if they find one and let him go
Chances are they might not never find one no mo'
Keep it greasey so it'll go down easy
Keep it greasey so it'll go down easy
Keep it greasey so it'll go down easy

[MANX:]
Roll it over 'n grease it down
I'll drive you through the heart of town

[JOE:]
A good lovin' man is hardest to find
A good woman needs to ease her mind
And I know a few that need to ease it behind
All y'gotta do is grease it down
'N everything is fine
Keep it greasey so it'll go down easy
Keep it greasey so it'll go down easy
Keep it greasey so it'll go down easy

[MANX:]
Roll it over n grease it down
I'll drive you through the heart of town

[JOE:]
A girl don't need
No fancy grease
To get herself
Some rump release
Any kind
Of lube'll do
Maybe from another
Part of you
Lube from the North
Lube from the South
Take a little slobber
From the side of your mouth
Roll it over
Grease it down
Here come that crazy
Screamin' sound...
Keep it greasey so it'll go down easy
Keep it greasey so it'll go down easy
Keep it greasey so it'll go down easy
Roll it over 'n grease it down, down, down
Grease it down...
Oh no! Here comes that screamin sound again...

And sure enough the walls of the prison did reverberate with
all sorts of screamin' sounds as lawyers and execs and promo
personages all decide to jump on JOE for a spectacular high
speed gang-bang leading to...