Frank Zappa

[fox69]

"Concentration Moon, Part One"

"Concentration Moon, Part One"


[Fillmore East, NYC
June 5-6, 1971]

Concentration Moon
(Over the camp in the valley)
Over the camp in the valley
(Concentration Moon)
(OH WHAT A)
Concentration Moon
(I wish I was back in the alley)
Wish I was back in the alley
With all of my friends,
Still running free:
(Running free!)
Hair growing out
Every hole in me
(That's right, you heard right:
Hair growing out
Every hole in me!)
AMERICAN WAY
How did it start?
Thousands of creeps
Killed in the park
AMERICAN WAY
Try and explain
Scab of a nation
Driven insane
Don't cry
Gotta go bye bye
SUDDENLY: DIE DIE
COP KILL A CREEP! pow pow pow

[FZ:] And speaking of creeps, here they are, ladies and gentlemen . . .

 

[fox69]

"Concentration Moon, Part Two"

"Concentration Moon, Part Two"


[Fillmore East, NYC
June 5-6, 1971]

[FZ:] Carl Sanzini will now join in on the second verse of "Concentration Moon"!
[Howard:] Why don't you?

Concentration Moon
Over the camp in the valley
(OH WHAT A)
Concentration Moon
Wish I was back in the alley
With all of my friends,
Still running free:
(Carl Sanzini, ladies and gentlemen!)
Hair growing out
Every hole in me
(That's right, you heard right
And here's one for little Carl)
AMERICAN WAY
Threatened by US
Drag a few creeps
Away in a bus
AMERICAN WAY
Prisoner: lock
SMASH EVERY CREEP
IN THE FACE WITH A ROCK

Don't cry
(No no no no)
Don't cry
(No no no, no-no-no no no)
Don't cry
(No no no no)
Don't cry
Don't cry, don't cry
Don't cry, don't cry
Don't shoot (no no no no no)
Don't shoot (no no no no no)
Don't shoot (no no no no no)
Don't shoot (no no no no no)
COP KILL A CREEP!
COP WANT A CREEP!
KILL ANOTHER CREEP!
KILL THE FUCKING CREEP!

 

[fox69]

"Conehead"

"Conehead"



Conehead...she ain't really dumb
She's just a Conehead...'tater chip crumbs
All over her face
Is there any more beer
Stashed away at her place?
She's just a Conehead. . .she can't help herself
"She's a Conehead girl..."
Pitch her a ring
That is the thing
That's getting her hot-uh
A hoop or a ring
Coin' over the top of her Conehead
"She is from a small town in France
'N she's a Conehead kind of girl, kind of guy"
That's what she gives me is-uh Oooh! Conehead
When she's on her knees
The point is so high
I keep sayin' please
Keep it out of my eye, she's a Conehead
(She's a Conehead kind of girl, kind of guy, kind of a girl-thing. . .)
Saturday Night
You're home alone
The TV lights up
As her dad comes home
He's been workin' all day
At the drivin'school
In a stupid-lookin' hat
That he uses to fool
The people of Earth
Who might get back
If they knew he was really
From Remulak, where the
Conehead. . .people are from, where the
Conehead. . .people go to, when the
Conehead. . .people are done with their
Conehead. . .things that are fun
Connie the Cone
Is dressed real neat
Like a teen-age girl
From down the street
But Mom 'n Dad
They don't approve
Carbohydrates
Is all they groove
Connie's eye
Has a tiny tear
But they rinse it away
With a case of beer
A bag of chips
'N fiberglass
Her diet's a riot
I can't keep quiet
I'd love to try it
But I think I'll pass
To eat that kind of stuff they pack
You'd hafta be from Remulak, where the
Conehead. . .people are from, where the
Conehead. . .people go to, when the
Conehead. . .people are done with the
Conehead. . .things that are fun, where the
Conehead. . .people are from, where the
Conehead. . .people go to, when the
Conehead. . .people are done, with the
Conehead. . .things that are fun

 

[fox69]

"Cops & Buns"

"Cops & Buns"


[Apostolic Studios, NYC
October, 1967-February, 1968]

[Patrolman Lefemine:] Now, we don't come up here because we feel like walkin' four flights at three o'clock in the morning.
[FZ:] Yeah.
[Patrolman Lefemine:] We were up here last night. Now for us . . .
[FZ:] Last night?
[Patrolman Lefemine:] Yes.
[FZ:] I wasn't here last night.
[Patrolman Lefemine:] For us to continually come up to this here place every night and not show no action other than to say, yes a corrective indictment . . .
[Guy #1:] Oh, sure this is ridiculous.
[Patrolman Lefemine:] We look kinda bad. I mean, let's be honest. Now if you had to give me any kinda reccomendation, or mark my word, you'll say, "Who the hell's kiddin' who? This guy's a mistake, every night, 3 to 4, 2 to 4, betwen those hours you guys are at 53 E 10 st, what are you doin' there every night? You mean you, you permit this condition to continue on without once giving a summons?" Alright, your lawyer said to knock it off! Uh, we're puttin' ourselves over backwards with these people. Do you know what we're doin'? Do you know what we're doin'?
[FZ:] No, tell me. Please tell me.
[Patrolman Lefemine:] Alright. Well this is, if we're up here once we're up here twenty times. I know that little guy, like a, like the guy at the, like a long-lost brother. Now if we ever get called down, if this ever goes to a big explosion, and they say, "Officer, what did you do, did you issue summonses?" They get, this is all in the rekkid book, how many times we've been up here. This is all rekkids.
[FZ:] M-hmm.
[Patrolman Lefemine:] Now if these people wanna subpoena these rekkids, they can subpoena these rekkids. An' they can find out how many times we've been. This is us on, wait! This is us alone! An' they say, "Officer, what did you do? Warn 'em? You mean to tell me you were up here about twenty times an you never issued a summons?"
[Guy #1:] There have been summonses.
[Patrolman Lefemine:] Well, WE never issued em! How many summonses have you gotten for noise?
[Guy In Charge:] What, me personally, or the studio?
[Patrolman Lefemine:] The studio! The studio.
[Guy In Charge:] I don't know how many, but there's a court case pending right now . . .
[Guy #1:] We've gotten one.
[Patrolman Lefemine:] ONE! ONE! And how many times have I, eh, uh, hey listen! As I say, if I've been up here once I've been up here twenty times already.
[FZ:] Hey look, stop it, pack that stuff up, stop making NOISE you guys!
[Guy In Charge:] Yeah, well, I understand, he didn't know . . .
[Patrolman Lefemine:] Well, who's in charge here at the studio?
[Guy #1:] Here he is.
[Guy In Charge:] In charge?
[Patrolman Lefemine:] IN charge
[Guy #1:] He's more or less in charge
[Patrolman Lefemine:] Are you in charge?
[Guy In Charge:] I don't run the studio, I just . . .
[Patrolman Lefemine:] Alright, listen, lemme tell you one thing . . .
[Guy In Charge:] I'm in, I'm in charge
[Patrolman Lefemine:] You're in charge at this point
[Guy In Charge:] Right.
[Patrolman Lefemine:] My name is Patrolman Lefemine
[FZ:] Here, have a BUN.
[Patrolman Lefemine:] Now, as of tonight . . .
[Guy In Charge:] Right.
[FZ:] You want a BUN?
[Patrolman Lefemine:] If I come back here, and every night that I do come back here, I don't care who says he's in charge, I will issue a summons.
[Guy #1:] I'm issuing you a bun
[Patrolman Lefemine:] An' anybody thinks it's a great joke, you can all laugh in the court.
[Guy #1:] Yeah, I issue it.
[Guy In Charge:] But, uh . . .
[Patrolman Lefemine:] You guys ain't got one hit record by now, my goodness.
[Guy In Charge:] We have, we have to . . .
[Guy #1:] It takes a long time.
[Patrolman Lefemine:] You know what I mean. This is ridiculous!
[FZ:] Are you sure you don't want one of those breakfast rolls on your way down the stairs?
[Guy In Charge:] Yeah . . .
[Patrolman Lefemine:] You better believe that I don't want nuthin'
[Guy In Charge:] Who gets, who gets the summonses, is the, the organization?
[Patrolman Lefemine:] Whoever it is in charge at the time. He could say Joe Blow, I don't care what kind of a name he gives me. Then if the courts decide, if they wanna know who he's takin' orders from, they'll summons that person to court. That's all there is to it.
[Guy #1:] Alright. Take care.
[Guy In Charge:] Right.
[Guy #1:] Okay.
[FZ:] Nighty-night!

 

[fox69]

"Crew Slut"

"Crew Slut"


[Act I]

But one night, at the
Social Club meeting Mary didn't show up...
She was sucking cock backstage at The Armory
In order to get a pass To see some big rock group for free...

[SCENE FOUR]
[CREW SLUT]

Backstage at the local Armory, MARY, in her little white dress,
is wiping the remnants of her performance off the side of her mouth
as LARRY (the guy from the garage who quit the band in order to make
an honest living) zips up the front of his stinking boiler suit and sings
to the same teen-age girls who were stomping and clapping a little while ago,
as they kneel with their little pink mouths open near the crew bus,
hoping to save the price of admission by performing acts of Hooverism on
the jolly lads who set up the P. A. System.

[LARRY:]
Hey Hey Hey all you girls in these
Industrial towns
I know you're prob'ly gettin' tired
Of all the local clowns
They never give you no respect
They never treat you nice
So perhaps you oughta try
A little friendly advice

And be a CREW SLUT
Hey, you 'll love it
Be a CREW SLUT
It's a way of life
Be a CREW SLUT
See the world
Don't make a fuss, just get on the bus
CREW SLUT
Add water, makes its own sauce
Be a CREW SLUT
So you don't forget, call before midnite tonite
The boys in the crew
Are fust waiting for you

You never get to move around
You never go nowhere
I know yer prob'ly gettin' tired
Of all the guys out there
You always wondered what it's like
To go from place to place
So, darlin', take a little ride
On the mixer's face

Be a CREW SLUT
Just follow the magic footprints
Be a CREW SLUT
Hey, you'll love it!
Be a CREW SLUT
It's a way of life
I ain't gonna squash it
And you don't need to wash it!
CREW SLUT
Hey, I'll buy you a pizza
CREW SLUT
Of course I'll introduce you to Warren
The boys in the crew
Are only waiting for you

At this point, the road crew, as all road crews must from time to time,
borrow some of the big rock group's equipment and have a blues jam
session, indicating to the kneeling maidens that they are endowed with
a great deal of raw talent, as well as massive meat. Obviously impressed
with LARRY'S ability to suck so hard on his harmonica that screeching
little noises come out of it, MARY kneels again and reaches upward in
gestures of supplication, listening intently as LARRY continues to sing...

[LARRY:]
Well you been to Alabama, girl,
'N' Georgia too
'N' all the boys in thecrew
Is bein' good to you
I know yer sayin' to yourself
'This is the way to go
'Cause when you need a little extra
They will give you some mo'
'Cause you're the CREW SLUT

[MARY:]
I'm into leather...

[LARRY:]
That s good! A lot of the boys in the crew
Love leather...

[MARY:]
And rubber...

[LARRY:]
Yeh, they like rubber too... shrink- tubing
With a hair dryer...

[ROAD CREW CHORUS:]
Trade your spot on the bench
For a guy with a wrench

[MARY:]
Ha ha ha...

[LARRY:]
You like that, huh?
I told you you'd love it...
It's a way of life!

[ROAD CREW CHORUS:]
The guys in the crew
Have got a present for you!

[MARY:]
A present for me?

[LARRY:] We got a present for you!

[MARY:]
Whaddya got?
Whaddya gonna give me?

[LARRY:]
It looks just like a TeleFunken U-47
You'll love it...

[MARY:] With leather?

[CENTRAL SCRUTINIZER:]
Eherrr, eh eh...This is the CENTRAL SCRUTINIZER again...
And so MARY was enticed away from Joe
By an evil barbarian with a wrench in his pocket
Lured into a life of SLEAZERY
With the entire road crew of some Famous Rock Group (I don't know whether it
was Toad-O... I don't know... I'll check it out)
Again we see MUSIC
Causing BIG TROUBLE!

 

[fox69]

"Cruising For Burgers"

"Cruising For Burgers"



I must be free
My fake I.D.
Freeeeeees me
Gotta do a few things
To make my life complete
I gotta live my life
Out on the street
The difference between us
Is not very far
Cruising for burgers
In daddy's new car
My phony freedom card
Brings to me
Instantly
ECSTASY

 

[fox69]

"Cucamonga"

"Cucamonga"



Out in Cucamonga
Many years ago
Near a Holy Roller Church
There was once a place
Where me and a couple of friends
Began practicing for the time
We might go

 

[fox69]

"Daddy, Daddy, Daddy"

"Daddy, Daddy, Daddy"


[includes a quote from Tell Me You Love Me]

Ooo-ooo, do you like my new car?
Ooo-ooo, do you like my new car?

She's such a dignified lady
She's so pretty and soft
You can't call her a groupie
It just pisses her off
(Yeah)
She got diamonds and jewelry
She got lotsa new clothes
She ain't hurtin' nobody
So that everyone knows
That she knows what she wants

Knows what she likes
Daddy, daddy, daddy . . . oooh!
Daddy, daddy, daddy . . . oooh!
Daddy, daddy, daddy
Look out . . . she's got her eyes on you

She left her place after midnight
(La la la la la)
She drove to the club
(La la la la-ee-ah!)
You know that her and her partner
(La la la la la)
Came here lookin' for love
(La la la la-ee-ah!)
They want a guy from a group
(La la la la la)
Who's got a thing in a charts
(La la la la-ee-ah!)
IF HIS DICK IS A MONSTER
IF HIS DICK IS A MONSTER
IF HIS DICK IS A MONSTER
They will give him their hearts

'Cause they know what they want
([?] they know about it)
And they know what they like
Daddy, daddy, daddy . . . oooh!
Daddy, daddy, daddy . . . oooh!
Daddy, daddy, daddy
Look out . . . they got their eyes on you

FAM-BAM-YAK-A-TA-TAHHH!

They know what they want
They know what they like
Daddy, daddy, daddy . . . oooh!
Daddy, daddy, daddy . . . oooh!
Daddy, daddy, daddy
Awright, you got 'em screamin' all night
(La la la la la)
Screamin' all night

Ooo-ooo, do you like my new car?
(Do it, do it, d'ya wanna-wanna do it, do it?)
It's a hip thing!
(Ooh!)
Ooo-ooo, do you like my new car?
(Do it, do it, d'ya wanna-wanna do it, do it?)
[?]
(Ooh!)
Ooo-ooo, do you like my new car?
(Do it, do it, d'ya wanna-wanna do it, do it?)
It's a Chevy!
(Ooh!)
Ooo-ooo, do you like my new car?
(Do it, do it, d'ya wanna-wanna do it, do it?)
You're a big gun!
(Ooh!)
Ooo-ooo, do you like my new car?
(Do it, do it, d'ya wanna-wanna do it, do it?)
['Cause they're dancin'!]
(Ooh!)
Ooo-ooo . . .

 

[fox69]

"Dance Contest"

"Dance Contest"


[FZ:] "One of the things that I like best about playing in New York is this
particular place, because it has-it has a stage that is conducive to, how
you say in the trade, audience participation. Now if there's one thing
that I really like, it's, uh, audience participation. Now listen... I gotta
figure out something that I can, uh-do you think we should have another
dance contest tonight? Oh, bey-the injured person dance contest. Well,
let's see ... Awright, I'll tell you what we're going to do. Here's a, here's
a guy who really wants to be in the dance contest aw-reety, aw-righty,
hey. Okay.. "
[BUTCH:] "You are great, man-you are great. You are the best, baby.
Do 'Dinah-Moe Humm'
[FZ:] "All right, now wait a minute-what's your name? Hey, hey-what's
your name?"
[BUTCH:] "Butch."
[FZ:] "Awright, the dynamic Butch. Here's a girl who wants to dance with
Butch. What's your name?"
[LENA:] "Lena."
[FZ:] "What?"
[LENA:] "Lena."
[FZ:] "Lena, meet Butch. Okay, Lena and Butch, couple number one. Hell,
heh. Okay, let's see-that guy there, with his... that-that one there with the
teeshirt on-no, no, the other one-this one-no, no-no no no, wait a minute,
wait.. . well, you're-actually, you're very nice, though. Would you like to
come up here?... Okay, but d'you think you can behave yourself?... Okay,
what's your name?"
[GUY:] "Tom, man.[mumble, mumble] you, baby, I [mumble, mumble] (gurgle)
you [mumble, mmf, etc.]"
[GUY:] "Arrgh, mmmf, glurg, [etc.]"
[FZ:] "Awright, now wait a minute. Awright, awright, now wait..."
[GUY:] "[mumble, mmf.] Ugliness! Ugliness!"
[OTHER GUY:] "Frank, you're my buddy! Amh. mmf'.'
[FZ:] "Awright, now wait a minute, wait a minute. I have an important message
to deliver to all the cute people all over the world. If you're out there and you're
not cute, maybe you're beautiful, I just want to tell you somethin'-there's more
of us ugly mother-fuckers than you are, hey-y, so watch out. Now..."
[GUY: (BUTCH?):] "Will you bring my girlfriend on stage, maybe?"
[FZ:] "Sure. All right, now you-he wants to get his girlfriend-go get your girlfriend."
[GIRL:] "Hey Zap!"
[FZ:] "Good to see you again."
[GIRL:] "Squeak!"
[FZ:] "I know."
[GUY:] "I ain't no fucking queer."
[FZ:] "All right, now look, here's what we're going to do. Awright. Now. This-it'll
be mashed, I'll save them, I'll save them for later."
[GUY:] "I'm not a fucking queer."
[FZ:] "This man is trying desperately to let everybody know that he is not a queer.
He's not queer, he's not queer. Awright, and now. .. You are going to dance, like
you've never danced before ..."

 

[fox69]

"Dancin' Fool"

"Dancin' Fool"


Don't know much about dancin'
That's why I got this song
One of my legs is shorter than the other
'N' both my feet's too long
'Course now right along with 'em
I got no natural rhythm
But I go dancin' every night
Hopin' one day I might get it right
I'm a dancin'fool, I'm a
Dancin' fool
I hear that beat; I jump outa my seat
But I can't compete, cause I'm a
Dancin' fool, I'm a
Dancin' fool

The disco folks all dressed up
Like they's fit to kill
I walk on in 'n' see 'em there
Gonna give them all a thrill
When they see me comin'
They all steps aside
They has a fit while I commit
My social suicide,

I'm a Dancin' fool,
I'm a Dancin' fool
The beat goes on
And I'm so wrong
The beat goes on
And I'm so wrong
The beat goes on'n'I'm so wrong
The beat goes on 'n' I'm so wrong
The beat goes on 'n' I'm so wrong
I may be totally wrong, but I'm a
Dancin'fool, I'm a
Dancin' fool

Yowsa, yowsa, yowsa

I got it all together now
With my very own disco clothes, hey!
My shirt's half open, t'show you my chains
'N' the spoon for up my nose
I am really somethin'
That's what you'd prob'ly say
So smoke your little smoke
Drink your little drink
While I dance the night away, I'm a
Dancin'fool, I'm a
Dancin'fool, efc., [etc.]

I may be totally wrong but I'm a
I may be totally wrong but I'm a
I may be totally wrong but I'm a FOOL-uh!

Hey, darlin'... can I buyya a drink?
Lookin' for Mister Goodbar?
Here he is... Wait a minute...
I've got it... you're an Italian! Hah?
Yer Jewish?
Love your nails ... you must be a Libra... Your place or mine?